dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
how drunk are you?
Several
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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