I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
