My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Randomize
