And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
