It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
