Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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