Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
