Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize