Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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