After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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