there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Randomize
