it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
