Quick, to the slutcave!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Your cock deserves a montage
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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