just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize