none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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