You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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