i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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