I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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