when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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