I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
