I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
