Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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