She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
