Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize