i already hear my dad disowning me
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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