i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
