hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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