In the future we'll all be gay
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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