The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I stole a fireplace last night.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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