I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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