If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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