We're facebook friends in real life
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize