piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
