My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
