I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
soo... how was my night?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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