I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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