I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
