what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i just google imaged poop.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
