my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
