she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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