what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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