sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
