I think I just saw someone hide a body.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
