i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
