Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
