I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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