i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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