would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
