I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize