so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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